An Irish Confession      

    Two Irish lovers are sitting on a bench, in a park.  They are holding hands, but the lady is nervously twisting her hands.

    Mary:  “Patrick.  I have something to tell you.”

    Patrick:  “Well, what’s on your mind? You know you can tell me everything.”

    Mary:  “It’s so terrible.”

    Patrick:  “You know you can trust me.  What is it?”

    Mary:  “Well, it was a few years ago.  Father lost his job, and no money in sight...”

    Patrick:  “So, what is it?”

    Mary:  “Oh...  we were so desperate...  for some time I had to turn...  prostitute!”

    Patrick:  “WHAT!?”

    Mary:  “We needed the money so bad!”

    Patrick:  “There is no good reason for this!  Endangering your very soul!  How could you?  YOU!  Mary, this is more than I can stand!”

    Mary:  “Not you, Pat!  No!  I thought you’d understand.  I thought you could still love me, even though I had been a whore.”

    Patrick:  “Oh!...  You...  Well, that’s okay.  For a moment I thought you said ‘Protestant’!”

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